Divorce and Domestic Abuse ...

All too often domestic violence survivors use all of their financial resources to hire an attorney and then come to find they have nothing left to secure a professional advocate that remains on their side. And then they feel frustrated, desperate, hopeless, and abused. Sound familiar?

You expect your attorney to represent your best interest and so it is understandable how you want to invest all you have in this relationship. But, what may not be apparent right out of the gate is that this person will need to be paid beyond the initial retainer.

Now if you have limited resources, which is the case for most domestic violence survivors, you could very well be in a compromising situation once that retainer runs out — if not sooner. Here's why ...

Divorce Attorney's Realities:

Your divorce attorney is not going to work without being paid. So he/she will need to strategize how this will be done. Who do you think he/she must appeal to in order to carve the way toward his/her financial sustainability in your case?

Most likely it will be to the one holding the purse strings. Now don't get me wrong here. I'm not suggesting that your counsel will pick up the phone and call your partner because he controls the finances in your marriage. That would be very unethical.

So how will your counsel arrange to satisfy his/her needs in order to remain as your representative in your case? He/she will need to turn to those who can access the key that opens the marital funds. To get this level of cooperation there must be some give and take along the way.

Advocate for Your Best Advantage:

If you are a domestic violence victim in divorce proceedings, refrain from putting all your eggs in one basket. Keep in mind that you may want a professional domestic abuse advocate that is not entangled in your divorce. That is, you may want someone independent of the financial politics of your case to help you stand up for your rights.